Rhett Laze's Birth Story

Rhett Laze - Two Days Old

My fifth child, my third son, was born on October 24, 2013. Why has it taken so long to write a birth story? Well, I haven't been overwhelmed by having a fifth really. I've been overwhelmed by people visiting!  It has been such a gift but has made blogging rather difficult. I think blogging can take a back seat for now.

So here is the birth story I wrote when he was two weeks old that has just been waiting to get posted:

On October 24, 2013, our family welcomed our youngest sweet one into the world. His name is Rhett and he was born at 11:44pm via c-section. His birth was not how I had hoped it would be or planned, but God has blessed us and I am overjoyed to have him in our lives. He is a gift from God and so was his birth. This is not a story about a natural birth or the VBA3C I had been praying for, and I do feel a bit defeated in that. Defeated is a strong enough word...I feel like I failed and made the wrong choice. Even though I have such strong feeling of second guessing my choice, it is a beautiful story nonetheless. 

On Friday, October 18, my contractions began coming regularly every 10 minutes, but they were still nothing I noticed. I had a doctors appointment and non stress test on Tuesday (the 15), and was checked for dilation and found no progress (3cm and 75% effaced). I was a bit disappointed, but at least that gave us a point to know when "change" happened. I set my deadline for a VBA3C for Saturday (October 19). Well, unfortunately for me, Saturday came and went. I pushed it till Sunday and then that flew by as well. It was so difficult to see those deadlines come and go. I was saddened and frustrated. I began my struggle to find peace. 

The morning of October 23, my contractions picked up in intensity. I could no long ignore them, but I could easily work through them, making dinner, doing bed time with my four children, hanging out with my husband, and cleaning. They were still ten minutes apart, nothing new. October 24, I had a non stress test again that morning and they registered very strongly on the monitor, but since they weren't new and baby was doing well through them, I was sent home.  I sent my husband a text saying it was his turn to try inducing labor…and we all know what that means. ;-)  We were on a time table, he was leaving for training in a few days and wanted to witness this little one's birth. He's missed two out of the first four, he didn't want to miss the fifth. So, we tried our natural induction when I got home from the doctor and I wound up with bloody show later, but nothing I was concerned about. Nothing that screamed "Lady! You're in labor!"

My contractions continued, I timed them for an hour, 5 minutes apart, but then I stopped because I got busy with dinner and playing with the kids. They would get closer together then get further apart all the time, I wasn't in labor. Well, when dinner and dinner clean up was done, I sat down and found that they were still 5 minutes apart. Decision time, my husband had to work in the morning, do we go in early enough so if it's a false alarm we can still make it home for a few hours of sleep or do I wait until the morning to see if I'm in labor. I wasn't convinced, but my husband was anxious to get this baby here. At 6:30pm, I was convinced, we sent grandma to the store while we got ready. 7pm, we were out the door and ready to have a baby…well, he was hopeful, I was less than convinced. On the way we chatted, we laughed, we were becoming very convinced that this was not labor. It wasn't painful at all, in fact, I didn't even notice more the contractions. I almost had him turn around, but we had committed to going and getting check. We got to the hospital, parked in the parking ramp and waddled my butt up to L&D just before 9pm. I checked in but there were so many women in the rooms there, I had to wait to be triaged for 20 minutes or so. No big deal, not labor. I had to use the rest room at this point, which confirmed I was still bleeding, but it looked like cervical change bleeding, nothing impressive. The doctor came in, decided to check me, convinced no baby would come tonight. Ok, we'd still get 4-5 hours of sleep before my husband had to leave for work. (The fact that he had to be to work at 4am was the reason we went in when we did. If we hadn't, I would have waited until my water broke, probably some time the next day) He started getting ready to go home. I did too.

She checked me. "Hmmm," she said. "What does that mean?" I asked, my husband's face lit up. "Well, we're going to get you an IV and we're going to have a baby soon." My husband's face was so excited. He sent text messages to everyone, especially the superiors at work so they knew he wouldn't be there since we thought we'd be waiting until 2am to have this sweet baby. I was 4cm, completely effaced, and my water was ready to break. He was coming soon one way or the other. I was kind of sad to be in the hospital at this point, but I had made my choice on going in to get checked and had the support from my family to be there. I do think that part of me will always question whether I should have waited and labored at home and fought for a VBA3C, but I cannot live questioning it. It takes away from my joy and I will not let that happen! If we had waited, I have no doubts we might have had a baby at home or an emergency situation. I'm glad I don't have to worry about which one it might have been. 

Well, things went fast from that point. The entire staff was in shock that I lacked any pain with the contractions. They kept telling me as soon as the spinal block got done I wouldn't feel them. People, if that's all my contractions were like until I was seriously into labor or my water broke, I could handle that with ease. Anyway, I labored in a bed for a couple hours until they had an OR open and staff ready. I went back and waited some more for this anesthesiologist resident to do my spinal. I've had four spinals and an epidural done…this was the longest and worst experience I've ever had. It hurt ten times worse than any contractions and he didn't even do a very good job. I ended up needing more medication twice through my IV just to not feel the pain of the surgery! 11:20pm, I was finally on my back on the table, my husband was brought in and they started. Ok, My husband was standing watching them do it. No big deal for him but I kind of wanted a little encouragement as this was the worse c-section ever…ok, not ever, but it was hard. There was a lot more pushing to get him out than with the other kids. I asked him a few times to focus on me. I couldn't breathe as they pushed. He had to focus on coaching me through the breaths. He did great. 11:44pm, he was out and I needed more pain meds. I got to see him for two seconds after they cleaned him up. 10 pounds 14 ounces. 21.5 inches long. Blood sugar of 55. The low range of high so they took him to the NICU and treated him with both and IV and bottles after I told them one or the other. Since I couldn't have that fight in the NICU, I let it go and prayed. God watched over him and blessed us with an easy transition to breastfeeding after the bottles. Another answered prayer!

He spent 2 days in the NICU, but hasn't looked back since. He's lost a pound, but that's what happens when mom is pumped full of fluids before birth. He nurses like a champ, sleeps like a sweet baby should, and has such a pleasant demeanor. The kids all love him and that is a great plus. No jealousy. No rivalry. No issues so far. I'm praying we are blessed with an easy transition. 

Since my sweet Rhett was born, I've struggled with my choice of delivery. I do wish I had labored at home, I do wish I'd push for a VBA3C. I regret my choice to go in when I did and let the staff kind of bully me into a c-section, but I will continue to fight for peace in my choice and I WILL ALWAYS love my sweet baby and his birth story. I am blessed by his arrival and cannot imagine my life without him or any of his siblings.

Week 33-34 Update

Well, I had another OB appointment, which happened to be the same day as my growth ultrasound. It took 6 hours to get to the doctors office and home, but that's alright. My sitter was late, so it wasn't my fault. I'm just thankful I had a sitter.

It was tough news for me to hear. Baby is growing "normally", which is awesome new. However, his head is measuring 5 weeks ahead of the estimated due date they have on file (so between 3-4 weeks ahead of the due time frame I came up with). I'm worried about VBA3C anyway, but his head size doesn't make me feel any more confident.

Physically, I'm exhausted. I'm having contractions all the time. One night, I woke up in so much pain from them I grabbed my husband and forced myself to focus on breathing. They eventually went back to what they normally are, but I was rather worried for awhile. It takes a lot for me to go in. I only went in when my water broke with my last baby. I had probably been in real labor for a solid 18 hours before  making it to the hospital at 6-7cm. Who knows, if I go into labor early, I might just end up at a local hospital needing transport to my delivering hospital. Or, if God willed it, I could deliver in our garden bath tub. No big deal, right? That would be a birth story!

My kids are doing well. They are all getting excited. Even Ziva pats my tummy and says "baby" when she sees me. It's super sweet. Daddy is stressing out, but only because he's in school right now. He graduates on October 3. We're super excited...though he has to get his scores up if he hopes to make his career what he wants. He doesn't want to settle, but he's got work hard for it. I'll be editing papers last minute I'm sure. :)

My mom quit her job this week and will be driving from the Midwest to North Carolina to help me with the kids for the last 4-5 weeks I'm pregnant and until I'm healed. She sounds very excited! I need someone here in case I go into labor early as Daddy doesn't have the ability to leave work or miss work, even for a baby. Sad story, I know...not really. I had Ziva completely by myself, so I'm not concerned. Babies are born everyday without their Daddy there. Wives have babies without husbands. I've already had two births without my husband, one completely alone (after sitting in traffic for 4 hours waiting for an accident to clear, just 8 miles from the hospital).

Prayer Requests: VBA3C still...the staff at the hospital is completely against it. The ultrasound tech said they would require me to have a c-section if I came to the hospital I'm at and the OB still says he wants to do a c-section. I'm frustrated and really not sure what to do. Maybe I should write a letter of intent to VBA3C...we'll see. I'm not even sure what I would write in it. Any ideas? Pray please. Above all else, for peace. I trust the God will provide for our needs and for our situation as He always has. I just need peace and my husband needs peace.

Weeks 30 & 31 Pregnancy Update

I skipped the last 3-4 weeks as not much is going on pregnancy wise. I'm getting huge, but I'm not hungry all the time any more. I'm hoping that means I won't gain tons of weight. That is always a concern for my dietician and endocrinologist. I normally lose weight when I'm pregnant. This time, I've gained a whole 10 pounds...shocking, I know. My first I gained 12 and lost it when he was born. My second, gained 15 and lost that plus 5 before leaving the hospital. Third, I broke even, gaining 10, losing 10. Fourth, I gained 17, but I lost 20. With her, however, I overate, trying to keep my milk supply up and ended up gaining 10 pound between birth and 11 month old. This time, I'm hoping to break even and get down to pre-marriage weight before the next baby, God willing.

It's busy with the four kids and being this far along, but I love it! My kids are a handful, but they are such a joy and I wouldn't trade my life for anything else. Zach and Asher are getting very excited to meet their newest sibling. Every time I go to any doctor, they ask if the doctor is going to take the baby out this time. There is an overwhelming sadness for them when I tell them not this time.

Birth planning is seeming like a constant battle. I really want this VBA3C. It's hard to explain to the doctors why, but they can't force me to have another scheduled c-section. If this beautiful little one decides to come before my 39 week c-section, which I am praying for, I will be trying a VBA3C...which means I will be laboring in a bed hooked up to constant monitors to watch for the uterine rupture or other "distressing" signs. Not ideal, but if God blesses me with the chance, I know I can do it.

I am still nursing and plan to continue to until Ziva is either two year old or not interested. I'm guessing she'll want to nurse until she's two. So, I'll start to completely ween after Christmas. I am hoping that continuing to nurse will help her adjust to not being the baby any more. Keely didn't do so well, so I'm really looking for something to help make it easier.

Not much else is going on in our home these days. Daddy, Lord willing, will not be here much for the next four weeks. We are praying he'll be finishing up his final school before a possible deployment and a promotion. We'd appreciate prayers for peace in this situation and that God would allow Daddy to get into this class. We are up against the re-enlistment deadline and are hoping to get to a real unit before having to sign again. Please, pray. We need lots of prayer for peace more than anything.

Blessings to you all!

Birth Plans: VBA3C?

I have four children so far. Three of them have come into this world via c-section. With my last baby, I didn't know I had the option to VBA2C. If I had, I might have tried, even though she was 11 pounds. :)  This time around, I am really praying about a VBA3C. It's something I have desired for years but have been unable due to medical teams who push for repeat c-sections and large or breech babies. If this little one isn't "huge", then I'll try laboring and if all goes "normally" I hope to deliver vaginally.

As I am seen at a University hospital, they don't have a written policy on VBACs. They encourage it if a woman has had one c-section. They start to question after two. My case, a diabetic with a history of large babies and three c-sections, they start to sweat. I asked my doctor about it on Tuesday when I was seen for a fetal-echo. He started sweating trying to tell me he was completely against it but that he can't force me to have a repeat c-section. The medical student with him was in awe that I would even ask.

Right now, we are in a wait and see mode. I'm prayerfully considering what might be in God's plans for us. I want a natural, vaginal deliver so badly. At the same time, I am not opposed to another c-section. I explained it to my husband this way, as a woman, I feel this longing to have a natural deliver. At the same time, whatever gets baby out healthfully and keeps me around to care for my family, I'm ok with. I don't need to have one kind of delivery. I have several children that need me, a husband who wants me around, and I'm not afraid of surgery (if I were, I wouldn't be pregnant again as I didn't know VBA3C was an option until researching).

As I continue my research on the topic, I will hopefully have enough energy and sanity to keep up with blogging so I can share the information I find with all of you. It is so hard to find good information and facts on VBA3+C or even VBA2+C. It even harder to find stats when you throw in diabetes. Much of what I hope to share will be for "regular", non-diabetic moms because it is so hard to find facts and numbers.

If you wouldn't mind, please pray for me and our family as we make preparations for this little ones arrival. I'm not due until November 8, but I am praying for peace and wisdom and am asking everyone to do the same. God is in control. I just need to trust that this baby will come as He sees fit, not me. :)

27 Weeks

I am 27 weeks along today! Happy 27 weeks!

Photo Credit

We do know what we're having, but we are not sharing names. We will announce once this sweet little one arrives!

That really isn't much to report. I have been having regular contractions for 7 weeks now, just like the last three pregnancies. My blood sugars have been running a bit higher than anyone would like the last week, so I'm sure adjustments will come soon. I feel great, except for complete body muscle failure when I get to the top of the stairs, but I've had tests and nothing is wrong. So, I just take stairs easy and rest once reaching the top.

Baby is doing well. Everything is wear it should be and everything looks normal. Baby is even showing the right size for gestational age, which is always nice. :) I can tell when baby sleeps and wakes because of the constant movement when I'm resting and no movement when I'm moving. Zach likes to sit and watch or feel baby move. He asked me to go to the "baby doctor" and have him take the baby out so he can see Baby now. I don't think the kids really grasp the concept of waiting for baby to be ready.

That's about all of an update there is for now. A quiet pregnancy is a good pregnancy, right? I do have lots of uncomfortable and unpleasant pregnancy symptoms, but I've had them since baby 2, so I'm a bit used to them.

Three More Months! We're all getting excited!

Getting My OB Care Off Post

I delivered Ziva via C-section at a university hospital where we live. When I found out I was expecting again, I assumed that I would get sent their for my care again. That hadn't happened and seemed to be a fight until last Thursday. The head nurse of the "high risk" side of the OB clinic on post asked me why I didn't try to transfer up to the University hospital. I told her was I had tried and she said she'd talk to the boss. She literally walked right into his office and spoke with him while I was sitting in the hallway getting my vitals done.

After a few more conversations, she let me know that I would be seen off base, but it would take time as the civilians on base aren't working after 3pm or at all on Fridays due to the budget cuts. Yes, they're all very sad. So, here we are. Waiting for the referral stating every reason why TriCare needs to allow me to be seen up at the university. My favorite being, I request being at the highest level NICU should the baby need it. If we're going to do it, we're going to do it all the way. Plus, they won't lecture me about having too many babies or the risks with diabetes.

So, I won't been seen for about a month (Yay!) and then I'll do my in-take at the university. Maybe we'll be able to discuss the long-shot VBA3C? We shall see.


Anyone have any good ideas for a picture for my pregnancy related posts?